In fifth grade I stood with my hands on the counters, levitating myself above the scale. First my big toe, then my entire foot - what would the number be? I saw the real number and shuddered. No, that can’t be it. At ten years old I held onto the counter and lifted some of… Continue reading Let’s rewrite the story.
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There was a time…
There was a time... When I feared upcoming doctor appoints, When I was scared of the fine line I walked between school and treatment. There was a time... When I felt utterly numb and closed off to my emotions When food was my absolute enemy When even the sight of butter made me squirm.… Continue reading There was a time…
Three Simple Crackers
How does it feel to get in a fight with your mind over crackers? That probably isn’t a question you’ve ever asked before. Or maybe it is, and you understand exactly what I mean. Maybe it’s not specifically crackers but something else - a piece of fruit, a granola bar, some nuts. “Georgia. You think… Continue reading Three Simple Crackers
A Piece of Chocolate
Yesterday, my family and I headed out in the early morning for a road trip to explore Minnesota, a state we visit annually in the summer. We travelled down roads lined with looming pine trees and passed glimmering lakes that sparkled under the morning sun. We stopped at some landmark destinations, including two lighthouses and… Continue reading A Piece of Chocolate
What would happen?
I was walking around my town last night when I overheard another conversation held by three adult women. I was actually on my way to meet a friend for ice cream - a very big step for me. Anyway, their topic was one not unlike others I had heard so many times before, however that… Continue reading What would happen?
Core beliefs
I am discharging from residential and entering into outpatient treatment as of this Tuesday. Though I am extremely nervous, I feel so much more equipped and prepared than my first discharge. I now understand that recovery outside of treatment is not going to be easy or linear. It is going to be an uphill battle… Continue reading Core beliefs
Happiness
I have been thinking a lot about happiness and the difference between my happiness before versus during the eating disorder. Before, I was truly happy; it was an in the moment, beautiful kind of happiness. I would wake up each morning excited for a new day and I would go to bed content. I… Continue reading Happiness